WOMANIZER

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MEN'S GUIDE TO UNDERSTAND WOMEN:

You want = you want

we need = I need

it's your decision = you better not even think about it

we need to talk = I need to complain

sure.. go ahead = I don't want you to

I'm not upset = of course I'm upset you moron!

You're so manly = You need to shave and you sweat a lot

I need new earings = and shoes and dress and makeup

I need new white shoes = and other 40 pairs beacuse they are the wrong shade of white

Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive

I'll be ready in a minute = kick off your shoes and find a good soccer game on the t.v.

is my butt fat? = tell me I'm beautiful

You have to learn to communicate = just agree with me

are you listening to me?! = too late you're already dead!

yes = no

no = no

maybe = no

I'm sorry = you'll be sorry

do you like this recipe = it's easy to fix so get used to it

Quotes!

1. God made women beautiful and foolish, beautiful so men can love her, and foolish so she can love men.

2. Sure God created man before women, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece!

3. According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice in a women is their eyes, women say the first thing they notice is they're a bunch of liars.

4. Women always worry about the things men forget; men always worry about the things women remember.

5. The more I know about men the more I love dogs!

6. Men play the game; Women know the score.

7. Can you imagine a world without men? No crimes and lots of happy fat women!

8. Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

9. Never refuse to kiss your girl infront of your friends. if they laugh at you, it's because they are jealous.

10. If you are talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

11. If you don't like the way she drives, you do it.